4 Reasons Why June is a Wake-up Call

by Jasmine | Jun 22, 2018 | Yoga Therapy

June is a superpower month. Not only is it one of those cute 30-day months (30 days hath September style), but is also the one time we actually celebrate a day feeling and being super longer a.k.a. Summer Solstice for us Northern Hemi folks.

And don’t get me started on the fact it’s a woman’s name (only April and May share a similar honor), which makes it a very femme-focused time.

As our good friend June winds down, we’ve officially made it through the first half of the year! This signals a time to slow down, wake up and reflect on how the year is going for us.

If you think of the year as an HBO TV series (typically 12 episodes to a season), June is episode six, the natural halfway mark. It’s like you’re watching the first season of Game of Thrones (GOT) and now have to decide if you want to keep going on the same path – finish the season and see who else gets beheaded – or if it’s time to cut your losses and start a different show.

For some, getting to the halfway point is excellent news because we’ve been crushing life (loving GOT) and can’t wait to do it for six more months — woohoo! Let’s keep showing 2018 who’s the boss!

For the rest – me included – we’re on the fence and not sure if this is for us or if we should switch to different goals (another show) for the year.

Regardless of how you’re feeling about this year so far, if you’re a glass half full or half empty-er, June is still an inevitable check-in point to wake up and be more mindful about your year and here’s why.

Alright, June. Let’s refocus on my goals.

1. June reminds us that the year won’t last forever: Congrats – we’ve made it through half the year and have all the learnings of six months stored in our minds and bodies. But this realization also highlights that we now have 50% of the time to reach our goals and that can be scary.

Just like we start each yoga practice with an intention, the half-year mark reminds us to check in on those intentions and decide if they are really the ones we should keep prioritizing.

This is a time to get curious about any issues or fears we may have about the rest of the year and celebrate what we’re feeling really good about. We need to take an inventory of how we’re feeling and where we want to go before we keep going down this path or pick a new one.

Mindfulness is all about building this same type of awareness and paying attention to our inner and outer worlds. Is anything interfering with our goals or is something supporting you that you should keep holding onto? Are we just going through the motions and failing to truly commit? And how does this make us feel?

One of my intentions this year has been to launch a YouTube channel for yoga therapy videos. Exciting, right? Well, to date I haven’t even made one. And while I talk about it a lot, this month has made me realize that I have accomplished very little towards this goal.

As I start becoming more aware that I only have six months left in the year, it’s given me a whole new sense of prioritization and highlighted where I need to make shifts and soon!

2. Summertime gives us space: If you’re like me, summer hits and you’re ready to be outdoors and get out of town. A lot of us use these months to get away and recharge our batteries. And with a little more space in our schedules, we can take that time to connect with where we want the year to be going.

Just like meditation gives you mental space to free the clutter, so does the month of June.

Now that we finally have time to re-evaluate and re-engage with our goals, we can see what changes we need to make. This doesn’t mean shaming ourselves, but using some of this downtime to get honest about what we really want out of the rest of the year. Again, mindfulness is critical here as we slow down to really pay attention.

Using a heart opener to create space to feel what I want for the rest of the year.

This is similar to why the beginning of the year is a perfect time to make new goals – we have a little more which means a little more mental space to focus. June is no different and just comes with better weather and cuter outfits.

With a lot of my clients on vacation, I’m using this time to brainstorm ideas for digital content. I have a few extra hours and a lot of extra mental space to dig into this work and make it a reality.

This space is also revealing that I can’t do it all and my budding digital business will mean less time growing my in-person private client business. It’s been a hard realization but one that I can now embrace since I’ve had a little time to get clear.

3. It’s easy to be inspired by the heat and fire: Longer, hotter days and melting ice cream cones are a signal that it’s time to get moving! All of the heat around us creates an energetic momentum to wake us up to what we really want.

While we may feel we’re slowing down, the environment around us in full swing with hot days and warm nights and that’s the best time to get back in our groove.

Now, that we’ve had a chance to re-evaluate our goals and the space to get creative, we can use the playfulness of summer to help us “dare greatly”. Taking risks in summer is like jumping in the water with both feet! It may be scary at first thought, but the feelings are backed up by the excitement and comfort of how good it will feel.

I’m using this time as my mental “summer camp” and exploring the digital side of my business. With a more mindful approach, I can focus my energy on what will drive the results.

I’m finding the power in the playfulness and asking a lot of “what ifs” to push me out of my comfort zone. That means researching and connecting with experts in the digital space and lots of experimentation!

Just as thousands of kids are using this time of year to learn how to ride bikes and dive into the deep end, I am also finding ways to challenge myself through the power of play!

4. Good weather means good vibes: Combine the space from #2 and heat #3 with the vitamin D boosting sunshine and you get an overall “feel good vibe” that needs to be harnessed. Vitamin D has been proven to fight disease and reduce depression, which means we’re more likely to feel happier and healthier with the extra dose of sun.

When we’re feeling good, we can be more free and fluid to be our authentic selves. It’s an inspiring time that helps us see our lives and opportunities through new sunnier lenses of hope, and sometimes we really need that!

The positive energy makes it easier to be more mindful and reconnect with those activities, goals, and values that will bring us the most joy for the remainder of the year.

It makes total sense that some of the angst that plagued us earlier in the year has magically faded away. Some of my limiting beliefs and triggers kept creeping in and I lost a little steam. Thoughts like, “you waited too long to go digital” slowed me in my tracks and halted my growth. I got caught up in a shame game, which pushed me further away from my intention.

But this good-mood season is helping me be mindful of these thought patterns, practice more compassion for my journey, feel motivated for what’s to come! I’m feeling excited and curious about what’s possible and refocusing on doing the work. I’m getting out of my head and into the world of doing.

We are such creatures of our environments so make good use of that shifting weather and wake up to the possibilities ahead in the next six months.

3 Mindful Steps to Noticing Your Triggers

by Jasmine | Jun 7, 2018 | Yoga Therapy

Time to talk triggers! Oh, the dreaded “t” word. At some point in our lives we will all have them, no one is immune. Even Oprah has them – so you’re in good company.

Setting an intention with Mel Mah to get clear about our triggers.

But what is a trigger? A trigger is an external event, situation, person or activity that sparks an emotional or physical reaction within us. Something happens and a wound, memory or experience re-opens and in that raw and exposed moment you feel A LOT. Often times we connect triggers to feeling of discomfort or dis-ease. But the truth is, there are just as many triggers that bring us a sense of joy, ease, safety and comfort as there are one that make us feel anxious or all “hot and bothered”.

Because I get a lot of asks around how to better manage aggravating triggers (as I like to call them), I will focus this blog on how we can explore these a little deeper.

Aggravating triggers are ones that can do just that— aggravate. This can show up in pain, sadness, increased stress, frustration and my big one, anxiety. And it’s not just the symptom or feeling that can throw off our day or week, but our response to to the trigger can greatly effect our life.

For example, have you ever gotten into a confrontation with a co-worker, friend, loved one, or even stranger on the road because you were triggered? Do you remember how that effected your day? Boy, I know I have and it’s always ended with me feeling unmotivated, fatigue, and unhappy. Some reactions can even send you down a spiral of doubt, fear, loss, you name it.

And to add fuel to the fire, some of the most common aggravating triggers related to stress, pain, and anxiety are ones we cannot avoid:

• Work – Commuting to work (traffic!!), being at work (sitting…ugh), and having deadlines at work have the potential to trigger our worries, increase our stress and create lots of tension.
• Family – Being around specific family members can make us feel more stressed, frustrated and annoyed than usual.
• Life changes – A change is just experiencing something new, but the uncertainty and lack of routine can make us panic even if it’s something we wanted (like having a baby).
• Social media – I’m throwing this one in because it’s given me some serious anxiety lately! Scrolling through “the ‘gram” and seeing everyone living their best life can trigger all sorts of comparisons, fear of missing out, lack of confidence, you name it.

At the core, a trigger is a habit. There is cause – your mom calls, your boss sends a rude email, you’re stuck in traffic – and at some point you learned or trained yourself over time to react to that fear – you panic, you get defensive, you scream, you shut down. Your reaction was initially part of your neurological “flight or fight” response to keep you safe, but is now a pattern (a likely old pattern) you are used to doing as a way to survive and protect yourself.

Workshop attendees getting deep into what’s underneath their triggers.

We all have triggers because life is filled with ups and downs and eventually we all experience some sort of trauma or challenge. That could be the emotional trauma of losing a loved one, being bullied, witnessing your parents fight or any time you have been made to feel that you’re not enough.

The good news is that since triggers are habits learned over time, we can unlearn them too! The bad news is that they are some of the hardest habits to break because many are embedded in how we see the world and ourselves.

Let’s look at an example. One of my biggest aggravating triggers is having a messy house, which triggers feelings of panic, anxiety, and a loss of control. It dates back to growing up in a chaotic house with lots of noise and fighting. So whenever my home is messy – looks chaotic and even feels chaotic – I’m taken back to that feeling of  being a little girl who doesn’t feel safe and that makes the grown woman version of me feel unsafe too.

You might be thinking, “of course a messy home elicits some sort of reaction.” But I’m pretty sure that around the world, millions of people have messy homes and don’t launch into a state of panic and extreme unease. Now what’s interesting about this trigger, is that it’s very specific to my home. I don’t feel panicked when my friend’s home is messy or a department store is messy.

Over the years I’ve done a lot of work on this one, so I am definitely more forgiving when things aren’t “perfect” and because I share a home with someone else (my husband), I try hard to not nit pick and get overworked (stay tuned for another blog on working through your triggers). But the first step to even working through those unresolved feelings is to “notice” what your triggers are. This requires a little mindfulness and a lot of curiosity.

Here are 3 easy and eye-opening steps to get you started: Stop, Breathe, Feel. Disclaimer: You likely have dozens of aggravating triggers, but let’s just focus on spotting one. 

1. Stop and observe the external: The very next time you feel the pit in your stomach, worried feelings, racing heart, achey back – stop and pay attention. You don’t have to do this immediately, but within the day take stock of your external circumstances. Perhaps, there was an external event that happened right before your feelings began.

What are you doing? Who are you with? What’s going on around you? Notice all of the details of your environment, your trigger is lurking in one of those areas. If you were talking to someone, what did they say to you? Get out a piece of paper or your phone and write down the details for later.

Meditation helps you practice breathing and uncover the layers of feelings.

2. Breathe to capture the moment: Very important step. You need to breathe so you can slow yourself down and get curious about the event. If you have a meditation practice, use that to meditate for at least 5 minutes. If not, try a 5-4-5 breath to help you focus – Inhale for 5 counts, hold for 4 counts, and exhale for 5 counts. Repeat this at least 3X to ensure you are clear enough to proceed to the next step.

3. Feel what’s going on internally: What exactly are you feeling? Yes, bothered of course, but what specifically? Are you feeling bad about a conversation that didn’t go as expected and now you’re worried that you’ll get in trouble at work? Get curious and detailed about each feeling and micro-feeling that is going on at that moment and the story you’re telling yourself about those feelings. Once you’ve figured this out, map back to the items from Step #1 and start making the connection.

Give this exercise a try a few times and see what you learn about yourself and what’s triggering you. Remember, when noticing triggers it’s important to observe and remain curious about both those that aggravate and those that bring ease. This type of mindful observation can lead to some really clear answers around who we are and also invite in a deeper sense of self-acceptance and self-compassion. Comment and let us know what you discover!